Sing.Laugh.Love

Flowers For Algernon

2007-01-09T18:18:00.000-08:00

That's right folks...

NCHS's Spring Show auditions are upon us. And the show...well, just look at the title of this post, and there you have it!

I'm really excited.
Really really excited actually, but as always, there are no guarantees.

I audition tomorrow at 4:50pm.

Yup.

Basically really excited.

If you want more details, just ask!!

thats all for now,
later days

~smile~
Sarah

Goody, Goody Gum-drops?

2007-01-04T10:34:00.000-08:00

yea....
Apparantly thats the password. I received an anonymous phone call this morning...a call from a blocked number. I didn't get to my phone in time, so they left a message. I've had a lot of experience with weird messages...but this...this put the psycho in psychotic....the shade in shaddy....

Basically, here's what the message was:

"uh hey duffy, um just calling to say that um... the, the stuff that you uh uh ordered the other week finally came in. So um if you wanna pick it up tomorrow around 8:30 behind 7 11 you know, do that. the pass word is goody goody gumdrops. don't bring anyone and uh i think that uh you can get all the skittles you wanted, but I think that you uh, well made up for it with the amount of uh cookie dough if you know what I mean... aiight cya."

Actually, thats the message word for word...uh for uh as well.

People are creepy...that is without a doubt the shaddiest message i've ever gotten.

yea.
~smile~
Sarah

When the clock strikes 12...

2007-01-01T14:02:00.000-08:00

Happy 2007 my friends!

Here's to the...
memories
Friends
Smiles
Tears
Complications
Relationships
Firsts...
Lasts...
"I'm sorry's"
"I love you's"
Forevers
Nevers
What was meant to be...
and what wasn't
Victories
Losses
Performances
Songs
Dances
and Amazing moments
Of 2006.

As for 2007? Here's to
a million more moments that make me appreciate being able to breathe
New friends
New opportunities
All the new's
Saving the old's
A little more organization
A little more "crazyness"
A lot more Happy
All the moments that will take my breath away....
All the experiences (good and bad)
All the moments
and making memories that will last a life time (or atleast longer than most New Year's Resolutions)

Happy New Year...Lets make it great.

~smile~
Still...
Sarah

Let it snow...

2006-12-04T20:00:00.000-08:00

The snow has ended for the time being, but it was truly a beautiful sight...

I wrote something recently...yea, i've been writing again...but I want you to read it...

I just wanted to send you all a message because it seems forever since we have seen eachother, or talked to eachother, or had any contact at all.
With the Holiday Season rapidly approaching, we all remember, and recognize, the people who mean the most to us and those individuals who have impacted our lives. Each of you holds a special place in my heart that cannot be replaced by anyone else.

I've written a little "poem" that I would like to dedicate to each of you. In honor of the person you were way back when, the person you are, and the person you wish you could be. Never lose hope, don't give up, have a little faith, believe in miracles.

Cliché, maybe...but it is true. With that, I wish each and every last one of you an amazing holiday season. One that is filled with wishes, dreams, hope, miracles, memories and a whole lot of happiness.
Thank you for all you've done for me.
~smile~
Sarah

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The other day you asked me...why? "Why is it that after everything you have been though, after everything that we've been through, after all the troubles and obstacles and barriers there have been...you are still there for me to talk to, you will still answer your phone if I call at 3 am, and you tell me you will always be there no matter where you are or what has happened?"

My answer? ...it's because I love you...and I always will, no matter what. And though you may not believe it or think it impossible, I will still love and care about you in those long stretches of time where we don't talk because our lives have become too hectic. Because we know that they do. I will still think about you every day and pray that one day our lives will collide once more. I will wish for your happiness because I love you, and I want you to be happy. That's why...

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Happy Holidays

Sweet Dreams my love...

2006-11-18T18:21:00.000-08:00

Hey everyone!

Saturday night, just getting home from Speech Tourny #4. It went well today, still no finals, but that's alright, we had 4 events with finalists today and we placed 4th, 4th, 5th and 2nd in those so that was good, but it was a rough tournament.

So far, unproductive weekend, but that leaves tomorrow for church!!! YAY...seriously, I love church!!

As far as the "issues" from last time, well, I'm okay now. Really. I promise. Both were resolved as much as they could have been resolved...so thats a good thing...

Thats really all I have for you at the moment, I'm actually off to hang with my college friends. And Yes, I'm actually serious...I have many college friends!

Later Dayz
~smile~
Sarah

What time is it? A Lobster.

2006-11-14T17:34:00.000-08:00

Ah yes...
Good Ol' Tuesdays. I'm serious, Tuesdays are usually one of the better days of the week, but I'm more of a Thursday fan. I don't know why...but I am. : )

So, I get to school this morning, and we start talking about "the walrus," it was...by far...the most amusing part of my day! That, and Katherine. Oh man, if you all knew Katherine, and then heard the words that came out of her mouth...HILLARIOUS!!
It went a little like this:
K-"When I get a boyfriend, I really only want one thing."
Me- "What's that?"
K- "Well, you know how you see couples walking down the hallway...?"
Me- "Yea."
K- "Well, I want to hold butt pockets!"

Absolutely amazing Katherine....when we make T-shirts, that's going on it!!
As far as the rest of the day, well... I was able to solve one of yesterday's problems. Remember that venting post? Yea. Well the first issue, has been resolved. I guess. She and I talked, for an hour and 15 minutes...so that's definitely something. But I still don't know how I feel. The fact that I went exactly 2 weeks...well, lets just say I'm still worried. But for now, I can breathe easy.

For the record, those people who save me at the end of the day, yea...they're my friends...and I love them.
Remember: When it's all said and done, and the "best" have won...I'll still be here for you.

~smile~
Sarah
p.s. Yes, always smile. : )

you sang, and I faded away

2006-11-13T20:28:00.000-08:00

You sang...and then I slowly faded away.

I know its been a while, but sometime we all fall off the face of the earth!

To explain whats been going on in my life for the past few months...would take hours!
As for the past few weeks, and days...so much.

I am currently struggling with two very important relationships. And needless to say, it driving me nuts! My on friend, she and I have been fighting since Halloween, but I still don't know why! I've tried to ask, I've tried to talk to her about it, but any time I think I have enough confidence, it very quickly turns into complete FEAR. I know it shouldn't, after all the whole theme of YLC was "No Fear, Our Shepard is Near," but I can't help this. I don't know what I did that made her so upset with me...but I can't fix anything if she won't even talk to me. I've been praying for 2 weeks now, and nothing has changed...I am still being ignored, I can still feel the glares, and I'm worried. I value the friendship we have more than most, but I can feel this relationship slowly fading away. The simple thought of losing her hurts more than you can ever imagine. I miss her.

The other problem is a bit more complex.
This other friend and I have been close for a while now. We've been surprisingly close since the day we met, really. We tried really hard to stay in touch, and managed to stay in pretty close contact for 3 months, until we saw each other again.

Reunions are always great (especially when they are for YLC right Brianna?) but this one was...well...different. At first it didn't seem like anything had changed, but as the day progressed, I began to notice the differences...

- We were closer, more friendly, I guess
- Flirting wasn't really an issue, but it was there
- Happy? Yes. I was very happy.

The 2 weeks following the reunion we saw eachother more than we had in 3 months, obviously. But with each time I saw this friend, I continued to notice the above "differences," some seeming stronger than others. I didn't ask questions though, there wasn't anything to question.

Or so I thought.

By now, you may know what is going on..but please, humor me. Sometimes it is easier to write how you feel than to put it into words.

So, I hung out with this friend for 3 weeks straight, and then...everything changed.

Nothing about the situation now, makes sense. Nothing. I have accumulated an enormous bubble of confusion and emotion. Unfortunately, that is my fault. You see, I very much wanted to find out what had happend during those 3 weeks, don't get me wrong there, but I didn't want to make myself vulnerable. There were, and still are, an insane number of questions on my mind, but I can't find answers to them just yet. You'd be proud of me though, for a moment anyway, because I almost brought myself to say something to my friend, but then....chickened out...quite gracefully.

Possibly the most depressing part of this story, is the fact that what I had been wanting to tell this friend...will no long have the effect I had originally wanted. Now, no matter what I have to say, it won't effect anything past or present. As far as future...only time will tell.

Sadly, I feel led on...to say the least. My friend, I believe whole-heartedly, would never intentionly hurt me, but I am. Not so much hurt, as confused. Definitely confused. It isn't my friends fault...you must understand, for the blame cannot be placed on anyone. Mutual? maybe. Of course I instinctively place the majority of the blame on myself because it was I who failed to ask the question when the question needed to be asked.

Rumors, as we all know, spread like wild fire and then die away when their story is "lost in translation." It seems that some "rumors" surrounding this friend were true after all, but I have no way of knowing (just as in any situation) unless I ask this friend.

I am usually the girl who tells people, "experience is what you get, when you didn't get what you wanted," and yes, I am learning from my own words, but it is harder than you'd think.
I know that these stories have been vague at best, but I can't have you knowing every detail of my life now can I?

I know all about wanting second chances. Believe me. But I am slowly beginning to understand that God's mysterious plan...doesn't include everything that I want, but everything I need. When I'm done thanking God for everything He's ever done for me, we'll all have passed on, but that isn't the point afterall. I guess what I'm trying to say, is that I wish I could have a second chance. All I need is one day to change the course of 2 weeks even! But without a "rewind" button on life, I have to manage the issues as they come. Even with a missed opportunity, another one is just waiting to be set in the spotlight. Kind of like me, I guess.

My brother taught me the concept of the Life Equillibrium a few years back. He told me that no matter what happens in life, even when you feel like your life is going horribly, just wait. Something good is bound to come along and compensate for all the bad. He was then, and still is, a firm believer in good out-weighing bad. I've tried my best to follow that example, but I can tell you from experience that if you aren't willing to look for something good, you're not going to see it. Even if it is sitting directly in the spotlight. I'm still praying on this (for both him and myself). I just wish...

for both of these situations, with both friends...these words seem to hold very true:
It was no accident,
Maybe Heaven sent
And everything worked out just
Like he planned.

It's not my place,
To mess with fate
You can't control what isn't in your hands.

And after all I don't regret a thing
I want to thank you
For showing me this life

And after all I don't regret a thing,
'Cause I know you,
And I know you'll be alright

Believe in Miracles, Never lose hope, find your Neverland, Live, Laugh, Love....but more importantly:

Sing, Dance, Live, Love
~smile~
Sarah

A case of the Wednesdays

2006-07-26T13:36:00.002-07:00

Hey everyone! Happy Wednesday... : )

Hope everyone's week is going well so far...mine is! Since YLC, my life seems so much more relaxing!! Its incredible. Really. You should seriously consider going next year!!

I don't have much to report right now...except:
8 days, 8 hours and 25 mins until SIX FLAGS!! (roughly) ; )

I'm really excited...if you couldn't already tell...oh well...

Thats all I have for now...Love ya'll Bunches

~smile~
Sarah

A case of the Wednesdays

2006-07-26T13:36:00.001-07:00

A case of the Wednesdays

2006-07-26T13:36:00.000-07:00

I'm Back

2006-07-24T18:53:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone...its Sarah!

My original blog site, well...it died... so I made a knew one! But thats is not the point of this entry...

Friday July 21, 2006 I left for the Joliet Dioscese Youth Leadership Conference. I can't even begin to describe the experience, but the above picture is of the girls in the YLC Choir!! All that I can really say about it is this:
FOR THOSE WHO WENT...NO EXPLINATION IS NECESSARY...FOR THOSE WHO DIDN'T...NO EXPLINATION IS POSSIBLE!!

If you want to know what the experience is like...join us July 20th 2007 for next years YLC... or visit Nick Pankuch's Blog!!

I love you all so much
~smile~
Sarah